I apologise in advance if it still seems a little jumbled; I tried to clean it up for everybody, but this is what I've got.

The Art of Drowning took on a whole new meaning for me tonight. At about quarter past nine, I went out for a walk in the woods and took it with me. I was angry, upset, stressed out and hurt from dealing with my family this week. So I go out in the woods, in the dark, dressed in black and oblivious to the world. Perfectly rational, right? Anyway, there are these two fallen trees together in the middle of one of the main paths. One leans on the other, which in turn leans on a live tree. The way they fell, one has one end on the ground and the other is elevated about five and a half feet by its stump. I used the one that touches the ground as a ramp to allow me to climb onto the other one. I just sat there until in the middle of Catch a Hot One, and I found something I thought was only for the dead. I just sat there staring out into the darkness, and I found peace.

A little way into Catch a Hot One, I jumped down and ran down a trail that seemed to be glowing dimly in a combination of what little moonlight there was and fireflies. I kept running until I was almost lost, at which point, I turned and promptly ran back to climb back onto the tree as 6 to 8 started. Then, again, during The Despair Factor, I jumped down and ran. Right after pausing to say, “My whole life is a dark room. One… big… dark… room,” I turned and ran to a rock I like to sit on. There, I sat and cried through Morningstar, stared through the blank space, and sang Battled at the top of my lungs.

After starting it again, I went and laid down to stare at the sky until partway through The Nephilim, at which point, I wandered over to curl up in the shadows on a nearby rock. As Ever and a Day was beginning, I sprawled out on the rock (perhaps boulder is a better word) and remembered something that someone at the board had quoted Davey as saying before playing it live; “This is comfort.” And you know what? It was.

At the end I decided to go home and write this down, but now I almost wish I hadn’t. I wish I’d stayed there, forever, maybe. Even though it’s not on AOD, A Winter’s Tale took on a new meaning for me as well. Someone explained it as being related to Wester and Days of the Phoenix with the underlying theme being love. For me, now it has become peace. “If only for one night together,” refers not to two people, but to having one’s head together as the saying goes.

Initiation is escape, getting away from the negative things in one’s life. There are no words because a successful escape often depends upon evading detection. It’s almost as if Initiation is the sound of silence. The Lost Souls is a call to others in similar situations. Standing upon the water and the earth are metaphors for dealing directly with one’s problems. “When you read do you only find the misery between the lines then take my hand and walk with me.” A pull in the right direction, toward sanctuary (Come to me your sanctuary). The line “I’ll take everything from you” is negative, but rather the dispellation (if that’s even a word) of these things holding one back. The Nephilim is addressing those gathered in The Lost Souls (whom I’ll later call Lost Souls). It illustrates the upside down way people in rough situations can come to look at things, and how life can seem to be speeding by (the seasons change without me). “The spirit song” is that thing in the back of one’s mind that provides motivation no matter how bleak things start to look. The bridge is a reminder of one’s potential. Ever and a Day, pure and simple, is comfort, like a big hug when you really need it. Metaphorically speaking, it’s standing in the eye of the storm and just losing everything but that moment of calm.

Sacrifice Theory is acknowledging that we all need to “feel the warmth,” or more directly, to feel loved. Sometimes knowing one is important to someone is all one has. This track is sort of the Strength Through Wounding type song on The Art of Drowning. Of Greetings and Goodbyes is finding solace in music and the presence fellow Lost Souls and not worrying about other things (multiple references, but ‘another monster’ seems most prominent to me). Smile lashes out at the source of the negativity. Ending the world/setting it on fire symbolises starting over because the world (as a whole or just one’s own world) is such a mess.

Story at Three is losing track of time (Again and again they blend into one my father the morning pushes through my moonlight love). “…but it seems that there’s someone here with me” implies recognition that one is not alone. Those who know difficult times and insomnia (what’s sleep) tend to be more alert than those with a false sense of security (wakeful, wry, and watchful). Simple as it seems, the ‘story at three’ is a news story, perhaps reporting the Lost Souls missing. We may be on the verge of tears, but our minds are content so we won’t cry. The bridge is apreciating, and perhaps for the first time noticing, the simple things in life. The morning choir could be birds and the like. Days of the Phoenix is realising we have to enjoy the moment away from it all with these others. No one knows where to find us (no one could see me). Try as we might to hold on to it, this might not last.

Catch a Hot One still seems somewhat sarcastic to me. It’s as if the Lost Souls are discussing their problems, but things such as “Let’s tap your heart so we can paint the walls and see if anybody likes the tone or the pain” are being said snidely on behalf of their oppressors in everyday life. Either that or someone has begun belittling the issues of others and this is hyperbole of different methods of retaliation to make whoever is being so depreciative feel the pain of others (or, referring back to The Lost Souls, “If you feel fine, give it just a little time I’m sure you’ll contract my disease”).

Wester is actually seizing the night for oneself to go enjoy it with other Lost Souls. It also refers a couple of times to the deep bond that very close friends hold, as well as the bond that some Lost Souls have forged because they have shared similar experiences. The layer behind the bridge identifies that freedom and begs to hold on to it; “One world away, we are just one world away. In silent rapture let us stay, one world away.” One world away from the stress and the anger, relishing the rare silence and stillness of the night.

The six figures of 6 to 8 are, again, the real world oppressors and persecutors of the Lost Souls, and coming to destroy the world refers to their obliterating of the Lost Souls usual comforts. They call together the storm by driving the Lost Souls to the brink of irrationality or even madness. The second verse refers to getting away, meeting thousands of other Lost Souls, and with some luck, making a friend. We feel as if we can’t go back immediately, thus “What new home will the night bring?” Much sleep is lost over these meetings, but everyone’s enthusiasm makes it seem worth the lack of shut-eye. The “words for you to keep” is a way of escaping ‘reality’ for short periods of time; poetry, short stories, fanfiction and other literary forms. The bridge is too confusing to explain if it doesn’t explain itself to you. Either it makes sense or it doesn’t.

Surprizingly, The Despair Factor is rather literal, although I feel it’s oddly placed in the album. Personally, I feel it belongs before The Lost Souls (the song). It’s trying to find one’s way to where the other Lost Souls have convened, but despairing at the lack of success. The fall (“I wait for just one touch, and I fall”) in a symbol of invincibility, as it’s followed by “Weightless, endless.” Morningstar is hope. Having found strength in other Lost Souls, there is regret of the impending return to the real world, but there is hope of better days on the horizon. The dead air between Morningstar and Battled is a sullen return to the real world, and battled itself is the feeling upon arrival, even after all one has been through with the Lost Souls.

I apologise now for the length of the background, but I felt it to be somewhat crucial to understanding where I’m coming from. I cleaned it up as well as I could, as I said. However, I wrote that, also as it says, right after coming home from spending quite a bit of time in the woods. Although my mind was clear in the woods, cucooned (sp?) in the comfort of The Art of Drowning (maybe that’s what sweet calamity refers to), when I got home, Battled was quite fitting and I couldn’t think as clearly. I didn’t include Dream of Waking because I was listening to the CD, not the vinyl.